10 y/o Edison: How many scientists does it take to change a light bulb?
His Dad: What’s a light bulb?
His Mom: IDFK. U tell me, Einstein.
am i feeling hopeful about the future?
A lot of my relatives are afraid of ghosts.
– kin dread spirits
just weaponized “with all due respect” at my condo board. and now we wait.
me: sorry but i just can’t sugarcoat this
my boss at Kellogg:’s: you’re fired
Just ate a cheap foil-covered Easter egg & it was so disgusting, I ate 9 more to ensure my initial assessment was correct. I concur with me.
Farmers who aren’t pro tractors, what’s your angle?
I saved 15 per
cent on my insurance by
switching to haiku.
A ballerina walks into a barre. Embarrassed, she splits.