Guys at work are always like “why are your shorts so short?” Then I spin kick an inch away from their face with such precision and they know
Kim Jong Un is 30, runs a dictatorship, executes ex-girlfriends, and openly threatens to annihilate the US. What am I doing with MY life?
Why did the US invade Iraq when Steven Seagal’s ponytail contains 85% of the worlds natural resources?
Overheard this locker room convo: “The new school janitor is weird. He’s always hiding in here when we’re showering”. I took my mop and left
Does North Korea remember what happened the last time a country attacked Hawaii?
Made a friend today. Well, I knocked on my window when a guy walked past my house. I’ll name him Terry.
Hurricanes, famine, disease, war crimes, child molestation, political corruption. And Jesus appears to mankind on a slice of toast.