i bought a michael meyers decal for my car window and my son said if you put that on your car i’m never driving your car. aww, look at how cute he is thinking he was ever going to drive my car
god grant me the serenity to accept the things i can not change and the courage not to set idiots on fire
plot twist: satan sold his soul to me
day 1: we’re in this together babe.
day 47: i can hear you breathing.
coffee: because shanking people is heavily frowned upon.