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Page of Marcmywords2's best tweets

@Marcmywords2 : For cardio I live beyond my means.

@Marcmywords2: "I'll do it after I'm dead"

People that don't know how death works.

@Marcmywords2: Age is just a number, like 100 hours of Community Service.

@Marcmywords2: There's 2 types of people in this world, the people that use birth control and the people that step on Legos at 3am.

@Marcmywords2: It's not a real relationship, until you've apologized to a locked bathroom door.

@Marcmywords2: Before Mississippi became a state, people measured time in Massachusettses.

@Marcmywords2: Your bio says you're 29, your selfies suggest you slept with Hemingway.

@Marcmywords2: If your therapist thinks your alien abduction stories make you sound delusional, just wait till they hear about your TC.

@Marcmywords2: Dating is an expensive way to find out you don't like someone.

@Marcmywords2: 72 Hour Deodorant is just another way to say "I haven't bathed in 3 days".