@Marcmywords2

Which sounds more foreboding, Impending Doom or Imminent Demise, I want this wedding toast to be memorable.

@Marcmywords2

You want a puppy? … correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you kill an artificial plant last year.

Annnnd that’s how the fight started.

@Marcmywords2

Did you know, that just by pretending to pee in the shower, you could meet Home Depot’s Chief of Security.

@Marcmywords2

From the looks of this gas station bathroom, I missed an alien autopsy by 10 minutes.

@Marcmywords2

It’s all fun and games till a Murder Hornet gets caught under your mask.