According to the amount of pasta I just made I’m a family of 8.
There is exactly a 7 second window between an omelette and scrambled eggs.
This whiskey tastes like I’m about to find myself a lot funnier.
People who yawn with no volume control scare the shit out of me.
Popcorn is great if you want to eat 100 of something and still be hungry.
Birds at 5am:
According to the amount of bacon I just put in the air fryer, I’m a family of 8.
Whiskey is not the answer.
Whiskey is the question, yes is the answer.
There is nothing “fun size” about 7 M&M’s.
I stubbed my toe on the foot of the bed and found out I know 5 different languages.