@Michael1979

New poster I stuck up at my local train station. I’m looking forward to catching up with everyone.

@Michael1979

My one weakness? Probably my unshakable belief that, despite a total lack of training, I’ll be able to do karate if I’m ever in a fight.

@Michael1979

If you fear that a giraffe has killed your wife and stolen her identity, these are the signs to look out for:

@Michael1979

Every funeral is open-casket if you’ve got a crowbar and a sense of adventure.