@MyPolishFace

hey Liam Neeson is your “particular set of skills” gettin shit stolen from you, like, always ?

@MyPolishFace

Me: guess what I shaved!
Him: your armpits?
Me: no
Him: your mustache?
Me: no
Him: your nec-
Me: I don’t wanna play this game anymore

@MyPolishFace

Me: We should go to the gym more often.
Him: I hate it there. It’s like a meat market. And I’m the expired meat.