@OldUncleDaveO

You say lasagna. I say spaghetti cake. Because my 3 year old won’t eat lasagna.

@OldUncleDaveO

I run from my car all the way to the front door of McDonald’s because fitness is a lifestyle

@OldUncleDaveO

If you are having anxiety over something you’ve said or done, just remember that 90% of the world only cares what you look like.

@OldUncleDaveO

I don’t go back to my hometown very often because I’ve burned too many bridges. And also because I am wanted for bridge arson.

@OldUncleDaveO

Pretty sure I just heard a grown man wrestle a bear in a bathroom stall at Chipotle.