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Page of PFTompkins's best tweets

@PFTompkins : Becoming a grandparent is the one time it’s acceptable to choose your own nickname and people blow it EVERY TIME. Why would you be Grampy when you could be DEATHBLADE.

@PFTompkins: Happening now: The young lady sitting next to me on the plane sneezed & I said “Bless you” & she thanked me then she immediately sneezed again & I said “You only get one” and oh she did NOT laugh

@PFTompkins: We are watching “It” from last year and not for nothin’ but Pennywise is mostly very bad at his job.

@PFTompkins: Well, time to go to bed & remember that I started and abandoned a huge organizing project that involved putting a bunch of stuff on the bed.

@PFTompkins: Never read the comments. Unless you're posting a comment. Then, read all the comments, because 40 other people already said that, genius.

@PFTompkins: Jurassic Park III on AMC. 10 min. in, 2 young scientists studying dinosaur fossils. FOSSILS. Hey, 'member how THERE ARE ALIVE DINOSAURS NOW?