7yr old: What’s 10+10+10+25+25+5+1+1?
Just drove past a new typewriter repair shop…
That’s not a front for anything illegal I’m sure…
If the stick figure people started committing more crimes… I could be a legendary sketch artist for the FBI.
Tried to text “playa” but it changed it to “player”
I must have the white iPhone.
Me: Dad, am I adopted?
Dad: Shit, like I’d have picked you?
This girl text me: “your adorable
I text back: no YOU’RE adorable
Now she likes me and I was just pointing out her typo…