Justin Bieber’s to be the new face of Calvin Klein. Awful news given he does such a terrible job of being the current face of Justin Bieber.
I’m never drinking & driving again because the last time, it was a disaster. I lost control and ended up driving to a Robin Thicke concert.
Since joining Twitter, about 8 aggressive lampposts have walked up to me in the street and punched me in the face.
The secret of a long marriage is accepting the utter euphoria you would feel from strangling your spouse to death isn’t worth life in jail.
I put the ‘c**k’ in ‘puts c**k in anything’.
When I was a kid. I used to come home drunk & beat my Dad.