@PleaseBeGneiss Computer: set password
Me: 2020
Computer: password is too long
@PleaseBeGneiss @PleaseBeGneiss [invention of baseball]
Guy: I’ll throw the ball
Me: and I catch it
Guy: no hit it with a stick
Me: then what?
Guy: someone else will try to catch it
Me: what if I miss?
Guy: someone else will try to catch it
Me: you could just say you don’t want to play catch with me dad
@PleaseBeGneiss If God sent a flood to wipe out humans for being perverts what kinda nasty shit were the dinos into?
@PleaseBeGneiss Priest: do you take this woman
Me: I do
[Liam Neeson glares from the pews]
Me: -not
@PleaseBeGneiss CDC: your mask should cover your nose and mouth
Picasso: how
@PleaseBeGneiss Adam: happy Mother’s Day, Eve
Eve: it’s tomorrow
Adam: happy Mother’s Day Eve
@PleaseBeGneiss Me: do you like piña coladas?
Date: yes
Me: *marking chart*
Human Robot
——————————
|Me: and getting caught in the rain?
Date: not really
Me: *eyes narrow*
@PleaseBeGneiss Clerk: we’re not that kind of mom and pop shop
Batman: *eyes welling*
@PleaseBeGneiss Cop: anything in your pockets I should be aware of?
Me: I don’t think so
Cop: *pulls out egg*
Me: what lol
Cop: *pulls out another egg*
Me: wait how are you doing that?
Cop: *pulls out third egg*
Me: ok mister
Cop: *pulls out egg carton*
Me: what a fun time we’re having
@PleaseBeGneiss [outside tomb]
John: ok but if we’re being honest Jesus was kind of annoying right?
Disciples:
John:
Disciples:
John:
Disciples:
John: he’s right behind me isn’t he