@PlopWaffle

Date : So you’re the youngest of three?
Me : Yep, my parents are both older.

@PlopWaffle

Lois : Clark, are those binoculars?
Clark Kent : Yes, I can’t find my glasses.
Lois : Put them down for a second.
Clark :
Lois :
Clark : No

@PlopWaffle

Interviewer : So you’re super fast at math?
Me : Yup
I : Ok, what’s 346×48?
Me : 804
I : That’s not correct
Me : Fast though.

@PlopWaffle

Executioner : Due to the power-cut we’ll be using the acoustic chair.