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Page of RadWizzy's best tweets

@RadWizzy : My octopus can beat up your octopus.

*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*
*octopus flicks cig*

"Lets do this."

@RadWizzy: "bob is coming over for dinner"

"bob from work or bob who likes having sex with doors?"

(loud banging on the front door)

@RadWizzy: wife in bed: it's ruining the mood
me in bed: it's ruining the mood because you're letting it
hobo in bed: I should go

@RadWizzy: [runs thru the funeral chasing a bagpipe player]

"Stop hurting that octopus!"

@RadWizzy: *walks up to Harvard with an avocado* one law degree please

@RadWizzy: (at the doctor)

Can u cough for me?
*coughs*
Can u exhale for me?
*exhales*
Can u make kissy noises?
*kissy noises*
Can you beatbox at my wedding? the dj backed out.