*hits on a guy*
He’s bleeding. I think I’m doing this wrong.
Falling for someone from Twitter is as intelligent as trying to give yourself a lobotomy with a sharpened jelly donut.
Is there such a thing as spontaneous feline combustion? Anyway, baking soda and vinegar are terrible for cats.
8 out of 10 men prefer not to date psychotic women with bad tempers, emotional baggage and daddy issues.
To the other two….
Hi, I’m MJ
Judging from the sounds in my trunk this guy would have had an excellent career as a drummer.
I just want to rub all over you……..
……..with the front end of my car.
My exes new girlfriend has been calling me looking for him for days. It got old. I gave in and sent her the map and shovel.
Thanks to Twitter I will never again ask a man “What are you thinking?” Because now I know and I am horrified.