me: i wanna see how high this cliff is

Charles Darwin: ok, go ahead

me: ill jump off and you count how long im in the air

Charles Darwin: wait but that could ki-

me: what

Charles Darwin:

me: that could what Charles


me: can’t wait to get that stimulus check

friend: you’re literally just gonna spend it all on useless shit

me: [cancelling order of 4680 candy canes] have you no faith in me


why is it that whenever i sit alone in my dark room for days at a time consuming ungodly amounts of food without any social interaction im “depressed” and “need to see a therapist” but whenever other people do it they’re “quarantining”