Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of Rockenden's best tweets

@Rockenden : If ever you're feeling down, and I can't be there to do it in person, just imagine me awkwardly patting your shoulder & looking at my watch.

@Rockenden: I can't love you. I'm still in love with a girl I saw in a toothpaste ad 15 yrs ago. She winced when she ate ice cream, I can't abandon her.

@Rockenden: To the first designer to make skirts so tight that a slit had to be added to the back: Good job.

Flip flop guy: Go stand in the corner.

@Rockenden: My yard is full of bear traps cos I'm a bit weird about sharing milkshake.