@SamanthaRae49

Him: “You’ll never find another guy like me.”

Me: “That’s kind of the point.”

@SamanthaRae49

I don’t usually talk to strangers but when I do its because I’m at the zoo and someone called a tortoise a turtle.

@SamanthaRae49

When people show me pictures of their kids I show them pictures of my exes. If I have to look at their mistakes, they have to look at mine.