@Samzen_

Judge: You shot him. How do you plead?
Me: Bleed? NO. He was the one bleeding
Judge: HAHA
Me: HAHA *High five?
Judge: Ten years with no bail

@Samzen_

Satan was all alone with Eve, NAKED, at the forbidden tree and all he did was to convince her to eat a fruit? GAY.

@Samzen_

World War III will happen when Jason Statham kidnaps Liam Neeson’s daughter.

@Samzen_

I throw my poop to birds to give them a taste of the parallel universe.

@Samzen_

All girls love surprises. I didn’t know putting a snake in her handbag was wrong. We can’t understand women.