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Page of SardonicTart's best tweets

@SardonicTart : *Vacuums for three minutes*

"Oh God I can't keep up with this house"

@SardonicTart: Didn't find a dead body on my hike again today this is starting to get frustrating.

@SardonicTart: I showered today because I know I won't want to tomorrow. I'm a planner.

@SardonicTart: I'm in a bad mood right now so I'm hoping to hear some good news about something bad happening to someone I hate.

@SardonicTart: Just googled "unsolved murders in my area" because I have some extra time and someone has to solve these cases.

@SardonicTart: Memorial Day was always my grandpa's favorite holiday because he was a WW2 vet and also loved to buy mattresses.

@SardonicTart: My 18 year-old was complaining about her job so I told her it'll be ok she only has 47 years left.