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Page of StephenBCramer's best tweets

@StephenBCramer : The bible says you can't buy your way into heaven but there isn't a church in the country that won't encourage you to try.

@StephenBCramer: Yahoo news reports that Johnny Manziel was forced to sit in the middle seat of an airliner. I guess they should have let him fly the plane.

@StephenBCramer: My dirty language got me suspended in school but many years later I get rewarded with stars and retweets, never give up on your dreams kids.

@StephenBCramer: Nana's house is getting real bad, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting another dead cat.

@StephenBCramer: I installed a mirror in front of my toilet so that when I run out of things to read I will have someone to talk to.

@StephenBCramer: My sister is holding her baby in one hand and a cup of Starbucks in the other, I'm going to toss her phone at her to see who gets dropped.