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@SummerCandyEyes : My son asked me if mayonnaise was a mammal.
*cashes in college fund
*installs a pool in backyard
@SummerCandyEyes: I like to make things awkward on first dates just by shouting "wrong hole!!" at inappropriate times, like when you're eating.
@SummerCandyEyes: Be yourself.
Except you, cauliflower, you have to pretend to be other food.
@SummerCandyEyes: The neighbor's cat brought me a dead lizard while I was outside having a snack on the patio, so it's now some weird interspecies potluck.
@SummerCandyEyes: I think all the women who don't get a rose on the Bachelor should at least walk away with a cat.