Funny Tweeter

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Page of TheBoydP's best tweets

@TheBoydP : All I’m saying is having a great sense of smell is not as wonderful as you would think it would be.

@TheBoydP: Ladies,

Please stop answering our questions with "yes, of course". All you're doing is forcing us to nod our heads like we knew that.

Men

@TheBoydP: I'm "When I get a haircut I think she cuts more hair off my ears and eyebrows than my head" years old.

@TheBoydP: Interviewer: Any questions?

Me: Do you think his parents looked at him as a baby and said “You look like an Engelbert Humperdinck”?

@TheBoydP: I can make six sentences with just the names of my two sons.

Chase will chase Will.
Will will chase Chase.
Will Chase chase Will?
Chase will.
Will Will chase Chase?
Will will.

@TheBoydP: Thanksgiving fact: Giblets are just Grandma speak for the gross stuff.

@TheBoydP: Can’t, I’m in big trouble with the wife. I put chips and salsa out for family and friends and didn’t use a Thanksgiving dish.

@TheBoydP: STOMP! STOMP! CLAP!
STOMP! STOMP! CLAP!

We will we will drink you

STOMP! STOMP! CLAP!
STOMP! STOMP! CLAP!

*pours vodka after bad day*

@TheBoydP: I’m at the age I don’t remember it’s my birthday but my wife makes me feel better by reminding me I’m at the age I don’t remember anything.

@TheBoydP: I wanted to go see the Queen reunion concert but I am just a poor boy from a poor family...