I wonder how many animals we had to ride before we discovered that horses were cool with it.
“Am I as bored as you are?” can be read backwards and still make sense.
We don’t have voluntary control over our internal organs because our brains don’t trust us enough to keep ourselves alive.
Lasers were once the biggest scientific breakthrough in history, but now we use them to play with cats.
If Apple ever made a car they would probably have oddly sized/shaped cup holders just so people would buy their custom drink containers.
Romeo and Juliet is not a love story. It’s a 3-day relationship between a 13-year-old and a 17-year-old that cause 6 deaths.
With the rise of self driving cars, it’s only a matter of time before we get a country song where the guy’s truck leaves him too.
Due dates for babies are like estimated download times.
Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis, except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.
Maybe people are the dumbest creatures on Earth, and animals just pretend to be dumber to avoid talking to us.