@ThisLocalHater

Whatever, your kid should apologize to me for being so terrible at dodgeball

@ThisLocalHater

Hate it when I’m reading someone’s diary and they accuse me of having boundary issues

@ThisLocalHater

I bet this guy blaring Limp Bizkit can recommend a good defense attorney

@ThisLocalHater

“I’m not like other girls,” I say, walking into a closet I thought was a bathroom

@ThisLocalHater

All I want for Christmas is to have this generational curse lifted and also maybe an air fryer

@ThisLocalHater

[Running up to a burning house, out of breath, hands on my knees]

So when I was backpacking through Europe,

@ThisLocalHater

Sorry, I just saw your text from last night. Are you still being hunted for sport?

@ThisLocalHater

Me, eating an onion like an apple: Let me tell you why your relationships fail, pal