@UltraPunch

A lady from the bank called to tell me my bank card had been stolen. We had a good laugh about where the thief would spend all $17 dollars.

@UltraPunch

Avoid all fall relationships guys, they just want us for our hoodies and sex.

More so just the hoodies, the sex is to get us to take our hoodies off and lower our guard.

@UltraPunch

It’s impossible to say “mesh” without sounding like Sean Connery…

Also you just tried it.