Funny Tweeter

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Page of VanVeenB's best tweets

@VanVeenB : Tried pushing her against the wall to kiss her like all you guys suggested.

Put her head right through the drywall.

Goddam cheap motels.

@VanVeenB: If she asks what the weight limit is on your ceiling fan....

She's a keeper!

@VanVeenB: Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.....

or sandwiches....

Ain't no sandwiches either.

@VanVeenB: Good mothers let you lick the beaters when they're making a cake. Great mothers turn the mixer off first.

@VanVeenB: Dance like nobody's watching you.

'Cause they're not.
Nobody cares.

~Inspirational tweet~