@VikeeysSecret

Aladdin’s love for carpet rides must have saved Jasmine thousands of dollars in waxing fees and razors.

@VikeeysSecret

If I ever get married, I’m not wearing white. Nothing to do with the whole virginity thing, and everything to do with being a sloppy eater.

@VikeeysSecret

Got a passcode lock that takes a picture whenever someone tries the wrong code to look in my phone.

I now have fifty pictures of drunk me.

@VikeeysSecret

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Control Freak. Now you say “Control Freak who?”

@VikeeysSecret

“Just because you can’t dance, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t dance”
-Alcohol