@WorkingMom86

1 PM: I can’t wait to go to bed

1 AM: I should reorganize the garage

@WorkingMom86

My son fell asleep early, so I’m going to live like I did before having kids!

*cooks on front burner of the stove*

@WorkingMom86

*Cleans house*

*looks at family*

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave”

@WorkingMom86

My toddler woke up upset because he couldn’t find his glasses, but what really set him off was when I told him he doesn’t even wear glasses.

@WorkingMom86

“Will I ever live in a clean house again?”

*shakes magic 8 ball

*magic 8 ball explodes and makes a mess

@WorkingMom86

My son got very excited about all the toys he found when I cleaned behind the couch, I should have waited till Christmas morning to do that

@WorkingMom86

My son plays this game where he’s a bowling ball and the bowling pins are everything we own.

@WorkingMom86

I would never let MY child act like that.

-things my friends without kids say.