Funny how shampoo bottles weigh like, 2 pounds in real life, but when dropped in the shower they turn into a meteor.
I almost got hit by a car this morning and the scariest part was that my last words would have been “whoa there chap”
All I’m saying is that if M&M’s poured out of a person after you stabbed them, I’d probably lose my moral compass very quickly.
HOLD YOUR HORSES. Love your horses. Remind your horses everyday how much you love them. Feed your horses.
Listening to Jay-Z has literally taught me everything I know about whether or not a cop can legally search my car.