@anerdonfire2

It turned out to be a huge mistake filling that pinata with healthy snacks around kids with weapons to beat you with.

@anerdonfire2

Look lady, I’m sure your Onlyfans is nice but let’s wait until this funeral is over to talk about it.

@anerdonfire2

One minute I’m showing her my room dedicated to banjos and the next she claims she has to leave due to an emergency.

@anerdonfire2

She said she liked being choked so I bought her a box of triscuits.

@anerdonfire2

Apparently asking the car salesmen how many people can fit in the trunk is a no no.

@anerdonfire2

I was 15 minutes into destroying a plate full of ribs before I even noticed my date had left.

@anerdonfire2

Apparently trying to bribe a zookeeper to set up an animal Thunderdome situation will get you kicked out of the zoo.

@anerdonfire2

The date went downhill fast after I questioned which house from Harry Potter she belonged in.

@anerdonfire2

Establish dominance by ordering ribs on your date and refuse to use a napkin.