@ashlar36

I’m going to complain about the cold until a Canadian gets mad enough to say something rude, like ‘I’m sorry but it’s colder in Canada.”

@ashlar36

Fact: Canadians are legally allowed to be late for work once a week for ‘reindeer related delays.’

@ashlar36

Grandma: what’s oversharing?

Me: It’s when you talk about your hemorrhoid surgery on FaceBook.

@ashlar36

In Hell, you’re surrounded by people saying ‘suposably’ and ‘irregardless.’

@ashlar36

Secretly hoping my ex will call or text one day, just so I can reply, ‘Who’s this?’