@bananagrvyrd: My dog does this thing where it thunders and suddenly I'm wearing a dog hat.
@bananagrvyrd: If anyone ever saw me trying to zip up my jacket I'm pretty sure they'd make me repeat third grade.
@bananagrvyrd: Opened the lint filter on my dryer after washing my dog's bedding and another dog fell out.
@bananagrvyrd: My DNA results came back and apparently I'm .0002% aardvark. Which pretty much answers all the questions I've ever had. About anything.
@bananagrvyrd: Sometimes when I look into the sky I get overwhelmed with emotion and eat the nearest entire tree and everything living in that tree
@bananagrvyrd: People who talk to themselves are more intelligent then those who don't, or at least that's what I like to tell myself.
@bananagrvyrd: Just spent 5 minutes waving my hands in front of a manual paper towel dispenser if anyone needs someone to take their SAT exam for them.
@bananagrvyrd: So apparently you're supposed to change the lint filter in the dryer more than once a year firemen are hot