@bigsharkguy

medusa: look into my gaze

me:

dwayne johnson: did it do anything?

@bigsharkguy

perseus is an idiot, he brought a sword to beat medusa. that’s literally trying to beat rock with scissors

@bigsharkguy

snake: i’m poisonous, you better not upset me

me: ACTUALLY you being poisonous isn’t much of a concern to me! If you were venomous however—

snake: *biting my neck repeatedly*

@bigsharkguy

Jaws gets a 1/10 for me because it doesn’t end with a black screen reading “fin”