Indiana Jones & the hopscotch of doom.
Positives about working from home:
– There’s no commute.
– I can talk to the cat all day.
Negatives about working from home:
– I don’t leave the house
– I’ve started talking to the cat.
Sharon, call the vet
If Nostradamus had been any good he’d have called his book of prophecies ‘Predictive Text’.
He died doing what he loved, surprising tigers.
Doc: So, where does it hurt?
Pirate: In me chest, I think its me hearty.
If you want to know what cereal you don’t have ask one of the kids what they want for breakfast.
Alexa, find me a cat who’s hell bent on world domination just as soon as the weather picks up a bit.
Cop: There’s been another break in at the bakery.
Swan: I wouldn’t know anything about it.
Cop: *hands him a bread roll*
Swan: Word at the pond is that ducks did it, but you didn’t hear it from me.
Dr: Check his vital signs.
Nurse: He’s got 4G coverage & his battery’s at 60%