@dlsims01

Life is like a cup of coffee…

No matter how much sugar you put in it, there’s always grounds at the end.

@dlsims01

Invitations: $10
Cupcakes: $15
Facility rental: $100

Not having 20 kids in my house: priceless

Math of a mother

@dlsims01

My co worker is so mad at me right now her eyes are bulging out like a pug. I don’t know wether to call 911 or scratch her behind the ears.

@dlsims01

A woman always gets the last word in an argument, because anything a man says after that is the first words in a new argument.