@drinksmcgee
A murder of crows.
A conspiracy of ravens.
A manslaughter of sparrows.
A patricide of finches.
A genocide of hawks.
A zombie holocaust of pigeons.
@drinksmcgee
@drinksmcgee
These bats are posed like an early 1980s Goth band.
@drinksmcgee
Recipe: One small clove of garlic.
Me:
@drinksmcgee
If you marry the murder weapon, they legally can’t use it as evidence in your trial.
@drinksmcgee
This pandemic is really stunting my serial killer career
@drinksmcgee
My bathtub, after seeing me naked
@drinksmcgee
The Elm Street Daycare Centre has a strict “no naptime” policy.
@drinksmcgee
I think COVID-19 is just a ploy by Netflix to get people to stay in and actually watch Adam Sandler movies.
@drinksmcgee
*throws bread at her feet*
@drinksmcgee
Municipal Government: Try to stay home
Provincial Government: Try to stay home
Federal Government: Try to stay home
My boss: See you tomorrow