@fro_vo

Dog Teacher: did you finish your homework
Dog Student: (still chewing) almost

@fro_vo

who called it an infinity scarf instead of a scaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

@fro_vo

Interviewer: your resume says you were a waiter
Me: yes that’s right
Interviewer: where at
Me: out in the lobby right before this interview

@fro_vo

Genie: what is your first wish
Joe: i want to be rich
Genie: granted. and what is your second wish
Rich: i want lots of money

@fro_vo

Interviewer: congrats you got the security guard job
Me: *already asleep on a folding chair*
Interviewer: hang on u don’t start til monday

@fro_vo

Evil Queen: mirror-
Hand Mirror: what
Evil Queen: mirror-
Hand Mirror: WHAT
Evil Queen: on the wall
Hand Mirror: oh shit sorry

@fro_vo

[first date]
Me: so what do you do
Date: i’m a veterinarian
Me: thank you for your service
Date: veterinarian not veteran
Me: ok but still

@fro_vo

Cap: good morning Avengers let’s begin
Iron Man: wait spider-man is missing
Open Mouth Man: weird he was here when i went to sleep last nite

@fro_vo

*gets naked*
*gets baked*
*doesn’t get why they don’t rhyme*