Men are like “I just want a woman who doesn’t wear makeup, but looks like she’s wearing makeup”
“The worst they can say is no” okay but that like devastates me when it happens
My therapist: no one is judging you for doing that
Me: I judge other people for doing that
divorces should not cost money. you should actually get the money you spent on the wedding back, or at the very least, store credit.
My boyfriend does this completely insane thing where sometimes, when I ask him to take a photo of me, he takes exactly ONE photo
I believe if you regularly ask single women when they plan to get married, it’s only fair to ask married couples when they plan to get divorced.
Grateful to the visionary who saw beans that had only been fried one time and thought, “this isn’t enough.”
someone suggested riding a bike during the pandemic wasn’t safe, as if I wasn’t obviously planning on wearing a condom
I want to date someone funny but NOT fun. I want him to make dark, witty jokes under his breath while sitting miserably in the corner of a party.
Dating is so hard. Like, what does it mean when a guy doesn’t watch your Instagram stories, doesn’t like your tweets, doesn’t respond to your texts, and is dating someone else?