@ginnyhogan_

I believe if you regularly ask single women when they plan to get married, it’s only fair to ask married couples when they plan to get divorced.

@ginnyhogan_

Grateful to the visionary who saw beans that had only been fried one time and thought, “this isn’t enough.”

@ginnyhogan_

someone suggested riding a bike during the pandemic wasn’t safe, as if I wasn’t obviously planning on wearing a condom

@ginnyhogan_

I want to date someone funny but NOT fun. I want him to make dark, witty jokes under his breath while sitting miserably in the corner of a party.

@ginnyhogan_

Dating is so hard. Like, what does it mean when a guy doesn’t watch your Instagram stories, doesn’t like your tweets, doesn’t respond to your texts, and is dating someone else?

@ginnyhogan_

Exercise gets your heart rate up. Anxiety gets your heart rate up. Caffeine gets your heart rate up. You’re not better than me.

@ginnyhogan_

I had to break up with a guy because he told me I brought out the “best in him.” I was like wait – this is it?