@iGreenGod

A lot of guys hate it when I put both my hands on their shoulders and ask if everything is all right.

The guy at the urinal next to me seems particularly upset.

@iGreenGod

Pro-tip to avoid corona-virus

Eat garlic.

Lots of garlic.

It won’t do anything against the virus, but it will keep other people away.

@iGreenGod

This girl told me that eating a cake is the best way to calm you down.

I bet she never tried smashing it over someone’s face.

@iGreenGod

Gyms are open !

Just finished an intense workout session! (sitting in a gym judging one person for the past 2 hours)

@iGreenGod

Nature : Earth is 95% full. Please delete anyone you can.

Corona : Got it.

@iGreenGod

I wanted to be the last man on Earth just to find out if all those ladies were lying to me.

@iGreenGod

How many followers do I need more before I start tweeting quotes from Shakespeare and Mark Twain as my own?

@iGreenGod

Pro Tip : Give the person interviewing you “something to remember” doesn’t means giving them a bite mark.

@iGreenGod

I fell in love with a female electrician.

…She was a real live wire and i took her ohm with me.

@iGreenGod

There are two kinds of people here

1. Those who tried deleting another person’s tweet or reply.

2. Liars