@itsmebeegee07
I just attempted a smoky eye and long story short, the raccoons have made me their leader
@itsmebeegee07
@itsmebeegee07
Please teach your children how babies come out of the womb.
Otherwise, your kid is going to convince my kid that they were pooped out
@itsmebeegee07
I don’t know how to tell my mom that those 10 boxes of instant mashed potatoes she has saved won’t help us survive the apocalypse
@itsmebeegee07
I don’t know who let me be an adult. My daughter and I had a slime stretching contest that resulted in slime getting everywhere including her hair and pants
@itsmebeegee07
[5 wearing a watch that used to be my nieces]
10: You don’t even know how to tell time!!
5: *looks at watch* It’s time for you to be quiet