Jon if Garfield is too fat maybe stop purchasing ingredients and cooking full lasagnas for him you realize that’s dinner for a human family
Hey “La La Land” remember when you gave us that fake happy ending and then took it away
How’s it feel
Amazon is a $250 billion dollar company that reacts to you buying a vacuum by going THIS GUY LOVES BUYING VACUUMS HERE ARE SOME MORE VACUUMS
Nice try “Marco Rubio” — or should I say…
[rearranges letters]
“BIRAC UBOMA”
[audience gasps]
The genie sang that whole song about how he’s gonna be Aladdin’s best friend ever right in front of the monkey
But if two men get married, they’ll BOTH be stupid in detergent commercials and then no one will buy the correct detergent.
Good news class—you are exactly 9 years old, so from here on out, we’ll exclusively be reading books where the dog dies.