@kylekinane

My lyft driver had a nice Jeep Cherokee. I said “What year is this?” He had no idea I was talking about the car. Ride was weird after that.

@kylekinane

Im so mad Trump pulled out of the Paris Climate Agreement that I’m going to go read the Paris Climate Agreement now.

@kylekinane

There is no such thing as an antique car. An antique car is a horse.

@kylekinane

I ate a tomato slice off the carpet. And some lettuce. And some bleu cheese bits. And mushrooms. I’m saying I dropped my salad on the floor.

@kylekinane

Thank god that racist basketball guy showed up or we’d still be talking about how we’re not finding that airplane.