Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of lawblob's best tweets

@lawblob : Goodnight Moon, you albino m&m looking space-pebble garbage piece of shit

@lawblob: [the boss walks by my desk and catches me looking at sonic anime]

Me: the hackers are at it again. I was trying to visit church. com

@lawblob: Bowser is a job creator and the largest employer in the mushroom kingdom

@lawblob: I don't need the government telling me how to raise my kids

@lawblob: video games are cool because they let you experience fantastical power-fantasies. for example in The SIMS you have a job and a house.

@lawblob: pranking neighborhood teens by pulling my car into their driveway & putting a bow on it so they think their parents bought it for them

@lawblob: Waldo books are cute until u learn he owes $100,000 in unpaid child support & is wanted for arson

@lawblob: McDonalds actually does serve breakfast after 10:30 if u have a gun

@lawblob: son let me tell you about the birds and the bees... I left a window opened and they flew in and now I'm scared to go in that room

@lawblob: Son, its time we had 'the talk.' [dad removes shirt, starts projector, chugs 4 beers] Ok! So Tower 1 steel beams could only have melted at-