@lloydrang Today’s Forecast: Room Temperature
Tomorrow’s Forecast: Room Temperature
Long-Term Forecast: Room Temperature
@lloydrang 
@lloydrang Never mistake my kindness for weakness. Never mistake my silence for approval. And never, ever, mistake my appetizer for a sharing platter.
@lloydrang Texts delivered by Bluetooth right to your wrist? Not on my watch.
@lloydrang Parents who say they love their children unconditionally have obviously never had a kid choose tuba as their band instrument.
@lloydrang Way ahead of you, “cashless society.”
@lloydrang There’s no gangsta way to say “Oopsie Daisy.” I know that now.
@lloydrang By age 30, most men have found that one special hairstyle they want to spend the rest of their life with.
@lloydrang I think it’s safe to take the fax numbers off our business cards, now, everybody.
@lloydrang “Quinoa” sounds like something a ninja would say before kicking you.
@lloydrang Wait – my gym moved?
In 1997?