The problem with the Met Gala is you can’t stop picturing all the assistants having the worst month of their lives.
The best part of being a flight attendant has to be when you walk the aisle saying “trash” to everyone’s face.
Remember, you can always call your senator and leave a bloodcurdling scream.
The worst scene in La La Land is when Emma Stone gives Ryan Gosling permission to save jazz because she already solved racism in The Help.
I was worried that Tim Kaine was too boring and then I remembered entertainment is what got us into this mess.
“Suicide Squad” looks like a bunch of people Avril Lavigne hangs out with.
You can always predict what antigay protesters will say. But never how they’ll spell it.