@michaeljhudson

I flip off the rollercoaster camera, then buy a mug with the picture on it, ride it again, flip off the camera again while sipping my mug

@michaeljhudson

Prank: put a bucket of water on top of the door, then shoot your roommate in the stomach. When the cops come, they get soaking wet!

@michaeljhudson

I brought a t-shirt cannon to a knife fight. Everyone dropped their knives to catch their own piece of WNBA history.

@michaeljhudson

Cop: do u have anything illegal in the vehicle
Me: *thinks about all the drugs in the car* no
Cop: why did you just say asterisk thinks abo

@michaeljhudson

Whoops, pizza sauce on my hands. Better wash this off with soap and water. Oh poop on my ass? I’ll just use this dry paper and call it good.