Funny Tweeter

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Page of my_minivan_life's best tweets

@my_minivan_life : Just discovered my 7yo wearing his underwear backwards again. Playing classical music while pregnant is bullshit.

@my_minivan_life: 8yo: ...
6yo: ...
8yo: ...
6yo: ...
8yo: ...
6yo: ...
8yo: ....Punches 6yo in the face.
Me: Woah,what the hell was that for?
8yo: He knows.

@my_minivan_life: Just told my two kids that I love them both equally and the one with his shoes on the wrong feet totally bought it.

@my_minivan_life: Muffins - for people who don't have the guts to order cake for breakfast.

@my_minivan_life: Someone asked me today what was the toughest thing about being a parent. I would have to say it’s the kids.

@my_minivan_life: "Owen, you must hide this baby from Anakin Skywalker at all costs."

"Okay. Should we continue to call him Luke Skywalker?"

"That's cool."

@my_minivan_life: 8yo: Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Me: Yes.
8yo: Where?
8yo: WHERE!
6yo: (from outside) It's spreading.
Me: I'm up.

@my_minivan_life: No thank you GPS.I have this magic ring on my left hand that connects me to the nice young lady in the passenger's seat who knows everything