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Page of pittdave13's best tweets

@pittdave13 : First day as a dad
When I change its diaper is that when I oil the baby? Also where is the filter and how many quarts does it take?

@pittdave13: Bugs have antennas so they can get a few local channels for free

@pittdave13: Quit doubting my abilities, I can drive with one hand and crash the car with the other...

@pittdave13: My son found some handcuffs under our bed so I had to have "the talk" today...
I'm an international crime fighter now

@pittdave13: First date
Me: have you ever taken a selfie with a dog face filter?
Her: Yes, I love those!
Me: Well look at the time this has been fun...

@pittdave13: For the last time I said CAULK, I need black CAULK.
This isn't funny, what isle is it in