Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of rowdyforsheriff's best tweets

@rowdyforsheriff : [Turns to stranger at McDonald’s] So what you gonna get?

@rowdyforsheriff: [Taps cigarette]

Look son, if a girl invites you over for coffee, first make sure she has coffee. You don’t want to get over there and there’s no coffee

@rowdyforsheriff: If my dog has taught me anything it's if you're tired just lie down anywhere

@rowdyforsheriff: I keep a Batman costume hanging in my closet in case I bring a girl home and she finds it

@rowdyforsheriff: HER: I’m into the outdoorsy type

ME: [Trying to impress her] I dumped a body in the woods once